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This post is part of my 2022 Word Project. You can read what that’s about here.

Saturday, November 11, 2023

What did I do today? Zoned out. Literally. I have no idea how the day passed only that it did. I was in bed, I got up, and now it’s time for bed again and some twelve-plus hours have passed.

Since I deleted my timer app I have no record of what I did. Since I didn’t make any notes or lists I can’t tell you what I was thinking. Since this is the first time I sat down to write all day there is no proof I even existed, except maybe for this indent in the couch where my butt goes.

The couch is definitely starting to cave in on one side. The cushions really need to be reversed but since it’s a cheap crappy couch that wasn’t supposed to last more than a year let alone four, the cushions only go in one way which means I guess I will sit in a crater until further notice.

Anyway, I have officially given myself permission to have no idea what I did today. And the best you’re going to get by way of a word is zoned out.

I know I went to the Farmers Market because I had to pick up the coffee I didn’t get last week. And I only remember that because it required me to get out of bed.

Other than that I sat in my crater and quite possibly played word games because once in a while I look down and there’s my game, so I assume I was playing it.

I did not clean. I did not do laundry. I did not work. I did not think or plan. I didn’t even cook.

I did bake an apple pie for our friends because they just lost their dog and we wanted to send them something but everything seemed stupid and cliché. Like someone really needs a wind chime or a Christmas tree ornament after losing a family member. So I decided to do what I do best and feed them. I baked a pie and we drove it over and since I was utterly zoned out today I forgot to think about dinner so we picked up a pizza on the way home. And ate it. The end.

Being zoned out is highly underrated. Looking back on a day and having no idea what you did doesn’t seem like the kind of thing one would aspire to but for today it suited me just fine. Sometimes it doesn’t matter. It was Saturday and that was enough.

Not knowing what I did means nothing terrible happened.

Not knowing what I did means I probably had minimal to no interaction with technology, otherwise I’d be irritated enough to remember it. So that has to be a good thing.

Not knowing what I did means I have nothing to complain about. That might make me a little more boring than usual but I hereby give myself permission to be more boring than usual.

Consider it an extension of my rebellion.

And since I have no pumpkin pie spice malted milk balls left, and somehow the bag of chocolate covered Espresso beans is empty, too, I am going to assume that a very Bad Kitty ate them all and take myself back to bed before I put you to sleep, too.

Photo: my crater, and I suspect the culprit who ate all my treats. Maybe if she didn’t eat them all at once the crater would be a bit smaller.