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This post is part of my 2022 Word Project. You can read what that’s about here.

Wednesday, November 8, 2023

You know what’s stupid? Brains.

I know this isn’t a new topic but I couldn’t help comment on a tangential brains-are-stupid moment.

Ralph and I have a meeting with a business partner tomorrow. We’ve had it scheduled for about two weeks. For various reasons it’s kind of a big deal, so there has been much angst and stress and planning and working to meet deadlines.

When we scheduled the meeting, I put it on the calendar, set up a Zoom, and invited everyone. Or so I thought.

Today I wanted to double check the time. I opened my calendar and looked at tomorrow’s square. Nothing.

But… wait. I KNOW I set this meeting up. I think I set this meeting up… I seem to have a vague recollection of adding the Zoom link and everything.

But that was two weeks ago, and who knows what I did. Or what the calendar ate in between.

I panicked.

Ralph. The meeting isn’t on the calendar. Did I not put it on the calendar? Do you know what time we’re supposed to meet? Why isn’t it on the calendar? Did the calendar delete it? I set up a Zoom meeting. Right? Right?

:::continue for some time with babbling:::

Ralph looks at my calendar.

The meeting is… right there. Exactly where it should be. With the Zoom link and everything.

Now. There are one of two explanations for this.

One, his Technology Fixing Superpowers that engage whenever I’ve reached the end of my rope and finally throw whatever technology problem I have at him and all he has to do is look at it and it magically works again.

Two, the meeting was there all along and I just didn’t see it, because brains are stupid.

Don’t get me wrong. He has some pretty amazing Technology Fixing Superpowers. Some days I’ll be working on a problem for an hour until I finally fling my laptop at him and say THIS! And he looks at it and says What’s the problem? Because there is no problem that can’t be fixed by giving up and asking someone else to fix it while you try to explain the imaginary problem.

It falls into the “my car is making a noise” category where you finally bring it to the mechanic and he has no idea what you’re talking about because the noise magically vanishes. You know I’m not making this up.

But in this case, the more likely scenario is that my brain is, in fact, stupid. The meeting was there because the meeting was always there. Because somehow, sometimes, even though someone is pointing right at the thing in front of you and saying THERE! You still can not see it.

Ralph. Do you see my headphones anywhere?

They’re on the table in front of you.


Right there.

:::commence insisting that he is delusional because there are no headphones until suddenly there are:::

There is also the distinct possibility that the quantum realm and the Dimension Of Lost Socks has something to do with it. Possibly the calendar item and the headphones were NOT there for me but the universe realigned and then they were.

You really can’t tell with these things.

All I know is that it’s entirely possible to be looking right at something and all notions to the contrary just not see it. It’s happened with keys. And phones. And sweaters.

I mean, a sweater is a pretty big thing not to see, don’t you think? Yet you can stand there and stare at a closet shelf and pick up every last item of clothing on it and not be able to find that sweater until suddenly you do, or you give up and tell someone else to find it and they do, even though you touched everything on that shelf and swear it wasn’t there a second ago. I feel like for a sweater to be invisible there has to be some shenanigans going on.

Anyway, before this page disappears and I’m left walking around the house wondering where my laptop went, I’m going to eat more chocolate covered Espresso beans. Maybe they will even still be in the pantry where I left them.

Photo: you see them, right?